Saturday, February 11, 2012

I am a 32 year old virgin. My lovelife is a failure. Where do I go from here?

Since I'm giving up on women, I just want to know what went wrong and what do I do from this point? How can I live knowing my lovelife is a failure? No rude comments, please. I'm already suicidal as it is. Be humane!





I don't get it sometimes. I feel every single woman on this planet would want me as a boyfriend, but women can not appreciate me or see that I am the perfect boyfriend because my face is the ugliest face on this planet. I would be perfect any woman. Here are the reasons why every woman on this planet would want me as a boyfriend:





-I'd serve breakfast in bed every morning.


-I'd give foot rubs before going to bed.


-I'd cook whatever a woman wanted for dinner.


-When I go out shopping I'd buy a girl whatever she wants.


-I'd grow a rose garden so I will always have a rose to give.


-I would offer a box of chocolates every time a woman wanted chocolate. I would make sure the box of chocolates was always full.


-I'd write at least one love poem for a woman every day.

I am a 32 year old virgin. My lovelife is a failure. Where do I go from here?
keep trying dont just quit.....quit when ur dead....there is still hope 4 u
Reply:Why do you think you have such an ugly face? Who is telling you these things?





I'm SURE, I am 1000000000000000% sure, that if you could build your self esteem and see that you really arent ugly, you will exude confidence and become much more attractive than you think.





The reason you probably arent getting women is because you arent confident. You dont even want to be with you, so why would anyone else?





You need to surround yourself with POSITIVE people, and sincere people, who will be there for you, introduce you to great people, get you involved in great things and make you happy. After you get to that point, the women will come to YOU.





Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Start toughening up. Doesnt matter what the hell you like like as long as you believe you're worth it.





I read your other questions. You need to buck up, boy.





AND there are a TON of "ugly" faces out there who are dating rockstars, movie stars, supermodels. But they are exuding a certain confidence that you need to aspire to.





Get THERE and THEN you would be the perfect boyfriend.
Reply:I have a friend who didn't lose his virginity until he was 33, and he is extremely good-looking, and rich, and smart, and very nice as well - just very lacking in confidence. So it's no reflection on you.





Before you go looking for someone special, you need to stop being suicidal and feel good about yourself, otherwise you will pick someone who treats you badly so you continue to feel bad.





And don't forget - being in a relationship isn't all about giving, start thinking about what YOU want from a relationship, or again, you will choose someone who takes advantage of you. Don't be afraid to ask for someone who will treat you really well in return.
Reply:Well there's your problem buddy, you're too "nice."





Women don't want a guy who has "no life." I'm not being mean just stating the fact that girls don't want their guys to be focused on them 24 hours a day. They want you to be your own person, and live your own life, have things to do.. things that do not involve her.





The reasons that you gave for girls to like you (even though they seem sweet) are reasons for a girl to stay away. You seem lonely, desperate, needy .. Women don't want a guy who'll worship them and put them on a pedastal, they want one who's their equal. Someone to talk to, someone who doesn't hang on her every word, someone who has opinions about stuff and won't just agree with everything she says b/c she's "the boss." In short, you're a pushover, which women hate.





I suggest attending church services. There are many single women there are looking for long-term committed relationships. You make it sound like being a virgin is a bad thing, when in reality it's good.





Finally keep in mind that there are 7 billion people on earth, half of which are women! So, there are 3.5 billion women!!! and all you need is ONE to like you!
Reply:life sucks.mylife is same as urs.i am pretty and still my lover left me bcoz of a misunderstanding with parents.i dont knw wat to say as my life sucks too.
Reply:Unfortunately, first impressions do count, although they shouldn't. All animals, humans included, are genetically predisposed to finding the most healthy-looking, attractive mate to pass on their genes. However, you can do several things. Go onto a singles site where a woman can get to know you. A more radical suggestion would be to see a plastic surgeon who might be able to modify your appearance. Another suggestion would be to join a group composed of mainly women, like a cooking class or a yoga group. There, you'll be able to speak to women and maybe one or more of them will see past the surface to the beauty within you. Good luck.
Reply:Visit a prostitute
Reply:Not to sound blunt, but many of the reasons you list almost seem like stereotypes of what many people think a boyfriend "should" do. Now, I'm not saying these actions don't matter. It's always nice to have someone care about you, give you foot rubs, buy you chocolate, etc. etc. However, in a relationship, it's not just about how giving someone is on a surface level. It's more about their inner qualities and how these qualities match with the person they choose as their mate. Now, you may say you are the perfect boyfriend on the planet, but from what I've seen, you've only listed qualities that would be perceived as "romantic" but half the women out there. Now, my boyfriend never buys me roses. At first, this bugged the crap out of me, but later in our relationship, I realized that those type of things are often of little significance. I was so worried about being like my friends, whose boyfriends gave them flowers and chocolate, that I didn't realize that my own boyfriend had done many things for me that meant more: cared for me when I was sick, stuck around and let me vent when I was passionately angry at my boss, shared ideas in conversation.... A woman who is interested in the deeper things in a partner will not care so much about surface gestures.





In the long term, physical appearance is also not so much of an issue, as beauty fades with age. There is some things that are involved with initial attraction, but beyond that, a lot of it also has to do with the matching of personalities.





I hate to say it, but it does sound a little cocky to say you are the perfect boyfriend and that "every woman on this planet would want you are a bf." If you regularly say things like this is everyday life, I can see why women might be put off. Honestly, you are are only 32, and I don't think your time is over yet! I mean...I'm approaching my late twenties....I can only imagine how grim I would feel if I thought I was getting too old for romance!





I guess what I'm trying to say is, I think with some real introspection, you may figure out the answer to your own question. My other suggestion is to try a change of location where you can meet new people and new women.








And you said to be human in your question....well, some women perceive love poems to be creepy. I personally find it sweet, many women find it stalkerish behavior! :-D





Good luck
Reply:i think u need confidence. stop being a pushover, women hate that. the seond you meet a women you should have some sort of mystery about you. i would not be telling women ur a 32 yr old virgin that right there is a turn off bc they will wonder what the hell is wrong with u . when u meet a girl dont divulge ur whole life story, u will just scare them away. u need to be cool, calm, collective, alluring and u should have no troubles finding a women. didnt u ever watch 4-0 yr old virgin??
Reply:you dont look ugly to me , but why have you not been able to get with somebody is maybe the fact that you"re toooooo nice , its nice to be nice, but if a girl feels you"re a push over she will not want that.. because she may feel bad for taking advantage of a good guy , or maybe its because you didnt try to kiss them and so they think youre not attracted to them ?????????? love yourself first and god will send someone to you when he knows youre able to love yourself as well as someone else .have you ever asked god to send you someone.
Reply:first get some confidence second maybe a therapist can help you your 32....its not the end of the world
Reply:you are not ugly, don't put yourself down. im sure time is just there making a perfect opportunity for you. Just wait %26amp; see. Have faith in your spiritual devotion. everything has a reason. pretty soon you'll get what you want, even better.
Reply:Take your head out of the game for a while. After all that heartbreak, it's good to take a short break of a different kind. And the funny thing is, when you're not looking and just being yourself and focusing on growing as a person, you'll get some woman's attention anyway.





Forgive me for asking this question but please understand. This list you gave us, is it really you? Would you really do this for the woman of your life if you were, say, married with kids with a 9 to 5 job and maybe a tennis club besides?





You see, women love confidence in a man. If you're doing all these things because you fear rejection and will bend yourself 720 degrees over for someone else, they don't find that attractive because they'd sense the rejection in ya. Rather, just be yourself, both the nice and bad and you'll get the right kind of woman.





All the best.
Reply:Hi Extremely Nice...





You're not a failure, nor is your love life a failure...it's just not happened the way you expected it to.





You will find the right women, when it's supposed to happen. Don't do anything rash! It's not worth it to hurt yourself over being a virgin.





Relish it, embrace it...be proud of this fact. It's who you are, and you should be proud. :)
Reply:wow you sound really nice!but i'm just 14:-(
Reply:Love sucks.


You get sad and depressed with love also.





And when you get your heart broken, you find out there is a little bit more to life than love.


Life is not all about love.


Live it, Do things you enjoy.


ON the way you may meet someone. You dont know until you try.


You sound like a nice guy and girls usually wait too long to find a nice guy. But they are out there looking. You just have to look too.
Reply:listen, the truth is, women are becoming more and more shallow by the day. unless you're one of the super cute 20% of guys out there(most of which are under 25), you will have a disadvantage with women. meaning you will have to work at it and try to make women like you for your personality and other qualities you have as opposed to liking you because you're hot.





but that doesn't mean you will never a get a girl. honestly, i think when girls get hurt enough times(they deserve it too) they will get tired of living single and trying to get with super cute guys and will decide it's time to settle down and look for a guy guy they want to have a relationship with.





here's something you(and everybody) should know: IF GIRLS ONLY DATED AND MARRIED GUYS THEY FOUND SEXY, 80% OF GUYS WOULD NEVER GET A DATE(AND IF WE'RE TALKING GUYS OVER 25, MAYBE 90%).





it's true, girls are naturally not attracted to guys unless they're super cute. but when looking for serious relationships, they will not always choose lust. of course, for this reason, many of them will cheat later in life.
Reply:It isn't your face, it's your confidence level and the fact that you're a 'nice guy'. When girls are young they have tendency to be attracted to exciting guys, when they're ready to get married they look for nice guys.





It could very well be where you're looking also.


Clubs? Forget it, try church, lots of good girls looking for nice guys and they'll appreciate you for being a nice guy.





Repeat after me: IT IS NOT MY FACE
Reply:It sounds like you have only met very shallow people. Beauty comes from inside and you will make one woman a very happy person when you find the right one. Don't give up, there is someone out there for everyone, but you just haven't been in the right place at the right time yet. Hold on, she is out there feeling the same way you do and looking for you to and if you are not there.. she will never meet you. HOLD ON..
Reply:Just face the truth....you are GAY.
Reply:Oh my goodness, maybe you don't talk with your eyes well enough. You should talk to a woman with your eyes, let her know what your thinking that way. And if that's your face in the picture...heyyyy...u don't look half bad! And you sound like the DREAM boyfriend. Any woman that wouldn't want you must be a fool! Try approaching women now. Try getting a new wardrobe and a new haircut or something.
Reply:Halo


I think balance is the key...you can be nice but not extremly nice. Hold back the nice things you do so others would appreciate it and won't take you for granted





AND THERE IS NO SUCH A THING CALLED UGLY FACE! :@
Reply:I haven't had a lovelife since july of 1996. At first it was because i gave up on men. But after a few years it go lonely. Now i can't find a good man.Don't become like me. You won't like it.
Reply:It sounds like you are the perfect boyfriend.. you know waiting for the perfect girl that will not take advantage of you and will respect you because you have saved yourself for her is not a bad thing.. (you shouldn't be suicidal, you should feel really good about yourself, that you still have something to give that perfect girl that is going to come your way) Anyone that would judge just on looks is slime.. you don't want a woman like that anyway.. your personility seems beautiful and you will find the one you have been waiting for..
Reply:DON'T GIVE UP YOU'LL FIND THE RIGHT WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:You watch too much TV(movies)





What man does this everyday. I can understand special occasions, but every morning????





Chill out sounds like your trying too hard. Your a 32 y/o man.. If you have a job, ask some of your female co-workers what they look for in a man. Ask if your "reasons why every woman on this planet would want me(you) as a boyfriend" is reality.
Reply:www.myspace.com..sign up and meet new people!
Reply:Hmmmm...





I bet I know what the deal is... you are probably one of the nicest people on earth and you just don't get why women aren't into you. Well, here's a hint. Just from reading your question here, it's showing me that you lay it all on the line for these women to see. You wear your heart on your sleeve because you want people to know what a good person you are. However, as you can see - this is not working for you. You need to be a little more mysterious. Don't give your heart to people right away and expose your vulnerabilities. People take it and run with it. Wait to meet someone special before you start doing all of these things... it'll be worth it because they will appreciate it and make you feel special as well...and you won't feel as if you have been taken advantage of - which sucks.





Also, you should keep in mind that a relationship with someone should not define you. You define yourself. Dependency on someone is not good for a successful relationship. So start feeling good about yourself. You have a sense of innocence that other people don't and there are a lot of women that appreciate that. You won't have the baggage that comes along with that.
Reply:Geez, I wanna date you.





Just stick it out. Check out a few local bars and have a few drinks with some of the guys. I know when me and my girlfriends go out, we are always scopin out the men. Get out there and be social.
Reply:Man to be honest I was happier the few times i was single being with a woman actually kinda sucks. You cant do your own thing and they always nag you and wont let you hang out with your friends. So its not exactly a bad thing being single but if you still feel you have to have one just go to a singles thing on the internet. Seems everyone is hooking up online nowadays. Dont feel suicidal though thats uncool man life doesnt have to revolve around women, truth is women arent all there cracked up to be. Usually there a whole lotta problems and just a few minutes of fun sorry ladies not trying to hate on anyone but as a guy whos had a lot of girlfriends and am now married I have to tell the truth. peace out
Reply:First of all, you may not have noticed, but you kept saying "A woman" instead of like "my woman" or something like that...I don't know what that has to do with anything; it was just something I noticed.





Secondly, that's all nice stuff, but what about your gonads? You said nothing about them...They do make a difference you know...


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